Where my Memories lies

 I might be nothing for you. But you are a lot of things for me. I don't have right words to explain. But, still I want to let you know...

You are the "Song", I love to sing.
You are the "Pain", I love to gain.
You are the "Rain", I love to get wet in.
You are the "Mirror", I love to look in.
You are the "Story", I love to read.
You are the "Mystery", I love to hide.
You are the "Dream", I love to trust.
You are the "Bird", I love to fly with.
You are the "Breath", I love to take.
You are the "Truth", I love to be proud of.
You are the "Feeling", I love to feel.
You are the "Flower", I love to smell.
You are the "One", I loved as beloved.
You are the "Past", I loved.
You are the "Future", I'd only love.
You are the "Present", I love to love.

Doubt regarding your happiness? You fucking kidding me...Right! 

I mean why to question about any kind of feeling. Oh yeah I must be talking about relationship, love and feelings which I cannot ever understand, but I mean it... If you are trying to think about why you are not happy, you are doing it wrong babes.
Feeling is not a thing or a cloth to think about, whether I should have it or not. Its a beautiful experience, an emotion, a sensation which thrills you inside. You are glad, in love, sad, angry, or say irritated... Your face, tone everything just say it all. One need not to tell or ask about it.

Most of the times in a relationship, we try to keep things straight and normal. No one wishes any kind of complexity in it. But many times we end up discussing things, which takes you directly to a break-up. I somehow feel that, less discussion and more fight & forgive things work better. One night you fight for it, next morning you woke up like nothing happened.
Indeed that would be a pretty beautiful life.

A person should not indulge deep down in the problem solving well. That well is flooded with confusions, problems, tears, sorrows and many more negative stuff. In any condition we should try to keep ourselves far far away from it. I know life doesn't work the way I want to, but somehow I feel that it will get better if we start doing things this way. I am not saying this is perfect, there must be some sorted out solid solution for this, but when you are helpless and trying to save a relationship after a month break-up may be, you should not go deep in it. A patch-up session should be super romantic and cute without any negative thoughts or wrong doings of past. I believe!

But whatever, it totally depends on an individual's choice. One last thing: Till the time your heart is not broken, you won't know what it takes to keep a relationship go like nothing happened. And if you never experienced a broke relationship, you won't know what true happiness really means!

So break hearts and spread happiness!!

Stop Feeling your Feelings and let your body feel whatever it wants to feel.

Don't know. I really don't know. Its me who's forcefully feeling all this or people around me making me feel that

I am not that sad or depressed or embarrassed because I have make myself numb from these feelings. Its just that I hate hearing No, and when I keep on asking some of my friends and when they keep on saying no for things, I feel like I am bringing down my self respect by myself. Its like I have fed up up this word N-O.

They say, among friends there's nothing in context to self respect or anything. But what to do at some point of time you feel like its enough, its done, I can't bear your arrogant attitude anymore dear. You live with it.

I again experienced it with the same person for the n th time, can say. And today I am feeling is it just me who worries about things, who care about people, who is ready to go anywhere and everywhere and just want to do everything to make my friend happy or do I also show such kind of attitude. As far as I remember, I never ever said No, I mean in worst case, I might have, but if its possible in every way, I was ready to do whatever there was in my consent, and for this if I expect a 2 minute good talk or some appreciation instead, then I don't feel its too much. If you are not agree then you can say I am much of a  demanding person and I have much expectations from my friends. I am not going to blame you for this.

(I will do whatever I want to do, don't expect anything from me and neither I will expect anything from you. hearing these words from anyone can easily make you hate them but getting these words from someone you love is surely you don't want to hear..right??!)

I came here today as I was so fucking; frustrated with the behavior of my friend that I really wanted to kill her right there, but poor me I cannot. I just wanted to write something so that I can sleep peacefully, as I cannot bear negative thoughts for the longer period, as people say I am happy happy and always-smiling type guy, which is how much true to me I don't know.

Bad post I know. But its a random random and very random thought.

Don't ever let your friends down, they are the only creature in the world who are gonna be with you for the very short period of time, because when you migrate from one place to other you can never experience the same moments with your old friend. I was never a good social person that's why I left with few friends only but I miss all of them and I am trying to make most of myself with present ones.!! 

Love them and Enjoy with them, you gonna miss this time !!

(#Thu 21 feb 3:10 am)

 

I don't know from where in the blue these feelings came to conscious part of my mind, but  I always read and being told that, there is always a Thin Line between Friendship and Love. I never realized until the time I really experienced it which really brought me to this thought of finding out what it could be. We all know it is a thin line, but it could be the various steps of being a friend and then falling in love, or it could be the Lust or some kind of favor or in worst-case desperation for anything and everything.
More often when lust comes in between, it bloody spoils everything. A small discussion of kiss between a guy and a girl friend, could bring a terrible change in their friendship. They can either keep on discussing or end up with text sex, they could also end up with being a lover, or a new category came these days "fuck friends". I really laughed on this term.

Some Hollywood movies like No Strings Attached, Indecent Proposal, are bringing major changes in lives.

Like different categories of relationship that is properly categorized on Facebook, except "Live in-Relationship", there are hell lot of categories coming for Friends too. The main two new categories can be 'fuck friends' and 'Extra-Affair-Affair', though the later one should be in relationship genre but it suits here better.
I always wonder is the Sex or Lust, is the only thing left in this world. These are definitely not bad but it could be harmful, if applied to places where it should not be. Come on, you cannot kiss your best friend or friend, its way way different relation. One should not spoil it by bringing lust thing in between, not for fun too. Because I always read in my messages, there is a little seriousness in every Just Kidding; similarly, there is always some expectation behind every fun element done between friends. Either way you should have strong bonding, for say if some day you implement such thing, it should not bother you or you should forget it like some bad dream.

Every one commit million mistakes in their life, there's no one left in this world, who has not done mistakes, or in other case everyone has someone else to blame their mistakes to, because many of them don't have enough guts to accept the truth. In this hell world, if you accept your mistake and trying to be truthful, it means you are a pure impractical. No fucking doubt in it. If you are completely ignoring the truth and cooking up things to prove yourself innocent, I bet anyone will find you innocent. I know I am out of the track, but still this thing has a connection with my post.

Anyways all I know whosoever he/she is, out of 10, 8 people have lack of understanding and bonding. One cannot easily interpret between lies and truth, innocent or clever. Still they pretend that they are the smartest person among everyone. They have a very weak knowledge of relations, hardly anyone can differentiate between all the new old categories of Friends and if you are already in relationship, it does not bother much to people around.

While concluding, I want to give a small message.

Please maintain that thin line between Love and Friendship. Both are valuable relations in life. A small mistake can take your laughs and fun times and most importantly your Friend or your Lover away. Like "Old is Gold", stick to Friends and Best Friends categories, its hard to maintain equal friendship with everyone. Not all can be your best friend or BFF. So try thinking before committing any mistake and Save Your Relationship!! It is more worthy than your life, because without some friends your life is incomplete. 

Otherwise count me as the best example of having a fucked up relationship (#misunderstanding).

P.S: Apology for all the undesired words.

(# Mon18 feb 1:20am)

I wish I could see my dreams and hold onto them closely. It is like I have locked them safe from the world and now I have lost the key… sometimes I lag and keep myself away from the hard work and the pain that I have to go through to get near my dreams. It is so easy to forget your responsibilities and duties and I really think sometimes giving up looks so easy! You know, they say, there is always a home that you can come back to…for me that home has got wheels and the more close I try to get, the farther it moves away.

I am not a negative person and not even a grumbler, but now things just don’t look right to me. My dreams are so huge and I feel small. It is so hard to explain your decisions to people, to whom you have got to explain.

All through my life, I have been living a life whose purpose or meaning, I couldn’t understand. When I learnt to live my life on my terms, I started to enjoy the process and made decisions that would lead me to a better life. I can count on my decisions but the people around me just look for result. I cannot throw these people away and so sometimes I feel my decisions have given up on me and that is the scariest moment for me.
I don’t need my dreams to prove something but I need them to make me without them I would not have lived.

High time to start a new journey in pursuit of dreams woven long back. New destination, new peoples, new hope.

I hate my imagination , to give me such crappy and meaningless desires that cannot be fulfilled in reality, or that is not something I want to do in reality. How come I can desire something in my mind, and not really want it when it becomes (close to) real? This contradiction disgusts myself.

Anyways its time to celebrate. HBD Basu

One day I was sitting at the market parking lot, this place has became my hangout spot lately, specially when I am alone. I usually like to sit there just because I usually remain alone. But I am not a sort of loner actually. 

Anyways sitting there I was seeing a girl from last couple of days. A girl, small and smart. She was a like a street kid. I think she was Bangladeshi but I was not so sure of it. she came to me asking for money. I got away from her, and was swinging in my own thoughts. Then I brushed away my worrying and saw that girl again, this time she was right across another parking lot asking the people standing there. No one standing near me gave her money, she still continued hoping someone would. This is a regular feature I get to see in parking lot near market. 

I saw her the next day too, still doing her job dedicatedly and not giving up on us. She asked me again, and again the next day, and every time she sees me, but she didn't give up on me. I never gave her anything nor will I, ‘cause I know she works for someone else and this money will never fulfill her hunger or pain.