Don't know. I really don't know. Its me who's forcefully feeling all this or people around me making me feel that
I am not that sad or depressed or embarrassed because I have make myself numb from these feelings. Its just that I hate hearing No, and when I keep on asking some of my friends and when they keep on saying no for things, I feel like I am bringing down my self respect by myself. Its like I have fed up up this word N-O.
They say, among friends there's nothing in context to self respect or anything. But what to do at some point of time you feel like its enough, its done, I can't bear your arrogant attitude anymore dear. You live with it.
I again experienced it with the same person for the n th time, can say. And today I am feeling is it just me who worries about things, who care about people, who is ready to go anywhere and everywhere and just want to do everything to make my friend happy or do I also show such kind of attitude. As far as I remember, I never ever said No, I mean in worst case, I might have, but if its possible in every way, I was ready to do whatever there was in my consent, and for this if I expect a 2 minute good talk or some appreciation instead, then I don't feel its too much. If you are not agree then you can say I am much of a demanding person and I have much expectations from my friends. I am not going to blame you for this.
(I will do whatever I want to do, don't expect anything from me and neither I will expect anything from you. hearing these words from anyone can easily make you hate them but getting these words from someone you love is surely you don't want to hear..right??!)
I came here today as I was so fucking; frustrated with the behavior of my friend that I really wanted to kill her right there, but poor me I cannot. I just wanted to write something so that I can sleep peacefully, as I cannot bear negative thoughts for the longer period, as people say I am happy happy and always-smiling type guy, which is how much true to me I don't know.
Bad post I know. But its a random random and very random thought.
Don't ever let your friends down, they are the only creature in the world who are gonna be with you for the very short period of time, because when you migrate from one place to other you can never experience the same moments with your old friend. I was never a good social person that's why I left with few friends only but I miss all of them and I am trying to make most of myself with present ones.!!
Love them and Enjoy with them, you gonna miss this time !!
(#Thu 21 feb 3:10 am)
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